off the list

To paraphrase Al Pacino in Godfather III:  Just when I thought I was out, Taylor Gifts sends me another @#!% catalog.

If you’re not familiar with Taylor Gifts — count yourself lucky — they sell all the “As Seen On TV” crap.

The Shamwow, Singing Toilet Paper, and my personal favorite, the Peekaboo Pole Dancing Kit .

Back in July, I was in the market for something a little more pedestrian — some solar step lights .

As I’ve mentioned before, the only fool proof way not to get put on a mailing list is to call the #800 and order from a human.

Well, I’m the fool and here’s the proof.

After specifically informing the Taylor Gifts representative that I would not order unless they could assure me  I would not be placed on their mailing list — and after receiving said assurance — I ordered the lights.

On July 29 — before I even received the lights — I received a Taylor Gifts catalog.

On August 15 — still not in receipt of the lights — I received a Get Organized catalog.

While I have since received the lights — not bad — I have also received at total of 5 Taylor Gifts catalogs — not good.

This morning, I spoke with the catalog removal representative at Taylor Gifts  — 800-829.0034, ext. 4 — who stated:

• If you order via telephone or internet, you will be put on a mailing list, no ifs, ands, or buts
• You will receive 6-8 months of catalogs
• There is no guarantee  I will ever be removed from their list

So by ordering these energy efficient solar lights, I directly caused unknown trees to be felled, diesel to be burned, and pollutants to be released.

I suck.

But at least I’m not alone.

Taylor Gifts — for catalog overkill, name serialization, and general frustration — you are On My List.