off the list

Guess what truly terrific present I just received from Taylor Gifts!

Nope.  Something even better.

As previously chronicled here, a good-hearted attempt to lessen my global carbon footprint resulted in a deluge of Taylor Gifts catalogs.

And despite my best efforts, I had resigned myself to a life fending off pitches for Micro Cool Mini Fridges and Remote Controlled Farting Bears.

But with Christmas coming, I thought “maybe,  just maybe” there was someone who would answer my plea.

So I wrote a letter (email actually).

Asking for a something that wouldn’t cost a penny.

No elf would be hurt in it’s making.

I hit SEND and promptly forgot all about it.

Well kids, yesterday, my wish came true.

So remember little ones, to get what you really want this year, forget Santa.

Contact the Attorney General of Pennsylvania.

And to all a good night.